Okay, is everybody here?…Good, let’s begin the meeting.
Folks, I’m glad you all made in to this meeting. I can’t stress the importance of this meeting enough. It is integral to the survival of this company that we are all here. Yes, I know it’s very early on a Saturday morning-but these are the sacrifices we need to make in order to keep this company moving forward. Every one of you here knows the value of moving forward, and maintaining sustainability of moving forward. We are moving towards a common goal of sustainability and moving forward, into a customer driven employee initiative to maintain forward movement and sustainability of those initiatives.
People, I think I speak for everyone in upper management when I say: Well done, everybody. Thanks to you, we can accomplish our goal of the sustainability of moving forward. Unfortunately, this progressive sustainability can only move forward with the appropriate budget cuts. That being said, we are now forced to let all of you go. We wish you all the best of luck in your future endeavors, and once again, thank you. Without you all, we would not be sustainable in moving forward.
Thomas Ryan – firstname.lastname@example.org